Return Of The Machines

This morning I returned to a certain performing arts venue in the metro area. I imagine my feelings were similar to those who visited the Normandy Beach decades after participating in the Allied invasion of the European continent. You are proud of what was accomplished, but the memories still fill you with loathing and dread.

I spent the better part of last summer installing the acoustic reflector panels that allow the sound of the room to be adjusted depending on what sort of musical performance is being given. I also installed the winches that hang the lighting fixtures over the stage.

I won't bore you with the technical details, but I will say that these lighting winches are the most heinous pieces of shit ever installed in a theatrical venue. Quite simply, they don't work. And they don't work because they were a stupid idea to begin with.

So today, I spent six and a half hours tinkering again with these things, trying to get them to at least partly function the way they were designed to. And I am back there tommorrow, with the theatre consultant.

Don't be surprised if you see me on the six o'clock news.