At 3:00 PM on Friday, I ended my summer day job.
I am now totally self employed, living the life of a freelance designer.
A part of me is scared shitless.
But the larger part of me is happier than I have ever been in my life. It has taken me a long time to get here. I had to go through a false start in college, a failed marriage and the loss of many of my dearest friends to reach this point, but I am finally living the life I am supposed to live.
Of course many would say the life I am supposed to live is one of seeking security, securing a good paying job with benefits. Owning a home and settling down with someone. But I tried all that (except the home ownership thing), and what the universe kept whispering to me, though I refused to listen for a long time, was that I had to feed my soul.
I believe to be truly happy, you have to do what you are. Unfortunetly for some, doing what you are goes in direct contradiction to what our culture says is a reasonable pursuit. Most people in the arts face low wages, lack of health insurance and other benefits, difficulty finding a partner who understands the needs of our profession*, and a society at large that often questions whether what we do is worthwhile. Well meaning friends and family members often harp upon these issues.
So it is easy to doubt. I did it for a long time. I lived a half life existence where I tried to maintain a standard of material comfort for myself and my exwife, and pursue my tue passion in my spare time. And I found this half involvement in the arts even more frustrating.
But finally, I could no longer deny who I was. And I started on a path.
Or, more acurately, I began to leap.
And the net appeared.
I decided to return to school to finish my degree at North Carolina School of the Arts. I applied and was accepted, but was unable to come up with the tution. I was talking about it with my father, and he said "send me the bill and I will pay it." He payed over $30,000 in tuition over the next two years while I fininshed my BFA. The net appeared.
In March of last year, while graduation was approaching and I was trying to figure out how I would be able to afford moving and restarting a stalled career, I got a call from a friend who was the general manager of the rigging company I used to work for. She offered me three months of work for the summer, which allowed me to get back on my feet in the community I wanted to work in. The net appeared.
Three weeks ago, while I was trying to figure out how long I was going to have to keep working the day job, I got three work offers that have let me go back to being a freelance artist. The net appeared.
If you can let go of your fear, have a little faith, and boldly pursue the life you know in your soul you are supposed to be living, you will be surprised at the ways in which the universe will open the path before you.
Leap, and the net will appear.
It really does work.
3 comments:
I'm glad the net appeared for you while you were leaping. I've got a plethora of bruises from where I missed the net or perhaps no net appeared! lol
Perhaps you have not been leaping in the right direction? Hmmm?
No I just think there are big freakin' holes in my nets LOL
Post a Comment